It's easier to complain than it is to fix, but I also think that's why people don't offer solutions more readily. Solutions are iterative and difficult. If you offer small solutions you put yourself out there to be criticized for the solution not being enough, and if you offer large ones, you open yourself up to criticism that the solution is unrealistic. This is why so few people go into politics and why it can be so dysfunctional in a hyper connected society. All is criticism.
"and suggest solutions" - that is key. There are plenty of people that bitch about problems, but precious few that can also propose solutions to alleviate the pain.
> "Bring solutions, not complaints" was something a manager at my corporate job used to say.
I have heard this before, but IMO, this is terrible advice. Identifying problems is a valuable trait, and the advice above tends to squash people's willingness to highlight a problem that they know is there, but aren't equipped to solve.
People like solutions to be brought because it requires less cognition, not because it's a good strategy.
The assumption that there must be a solution, and if someone isn't presenting one then they're a bad and unhelpful person, is the fallacy at the root of a lot of these problems. It is possible for problems to exist that people, and especially governments, cannot solve, or for which all the "solutions" are worse than the problem. Pointing out when that seems to be the case is not problematic, and in fact is a valuable service that should be praised, exactly because so many people get stuck in this mental rut of "if you don't have a solution you shouldn't speak at all".
Or the "solution" is for people who have issues but don't want help fixing them not to vent to people who don't have the patience for that. Listening to woe -- especially woe stemming from problems with easy solutions -- is emotionally draining.
Like the GP said, it's a two-way street. Understand your friends and loved ones and compromise.
People have limited bandwidth. Especially, it takes a lot longer to fix something than it does to just point out that it's broken. You can be right in every problem you point out, but if you point them out all at once, nobody can fix all that. Pick one and point it out (preferably also suggesting a path to fixing it), and then work with people to get it fixed. Keep your mouth shut about the others while this is going on.
I agree: solve the problem- if there is a problem. But don't work on the problem of why people are complaining pointlessly.
I think what the author meant was: don't get shaken or upset by peoples' seemingly pointless and illogical complaints. You can, most likely, defuse the situation with a bit of empathy and acknowledgment.
What you just linked doesn't seem to be about solutions looking for problems. Rather it seems to be about people looking for solutions but being bad at expressing what the problems are.
Part of the problem is... people are not good at stating their problem with words. A lot of the time they have a vague idea of disconnected parts. By the time they are able to write down the problem decently, it is already half solved
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