younger generations are losing the ability/will to communicate decisively in uncomfortable social situations, can't see any positive long-term effects here
Personally I think it's more likely that we'll adapt over the next few generations to cope with it, than it is that a conscious effort on our part will reverse the trend.
People underestimate the rate at which social behaviours change. I'm 27 and have younger cousins who have completely different social conventions and understandings in and out of school than what I experienced. Much of that is due to pervasiveness of the net and mobile. It's really bizarre.
Not all young people! But I have personally witnessed many young people speaking openly this way.
When I saw the statistics for my age cohort, my first reaction was to feel cavalier. It was a few minutes before I thought about the harm I could accidentally do to people in their 70s
Exposure to unfamiliar ideas is exhausting. Doubly so when the social behaviour that typically becomes second nature in adolescence no longer fits (IMO that’s why video calls are exhausting too - the usual subtle social cues don’t apply).
Attention spans have shrunk all across society. But it seems worse with the younger folks because they don't remember that it wasn't always like this. I don't think they are affected to a greater degree. It just doesn't seem to occur to them that resisting it might be a worthwhile effort.
Might come across as quite unbelievable for modern day western folks but that's basically exactly what also happens in China and in general East Asian countries. Totally archaic in the modern world and can become extreme hinderances for frank discussions, collaboration and productivity. Fortunately young people are gradually getting rid of those s especially among themselves but it's sometimes quite bad that many people of previous generations are still emphasizing those as civilized etiquettes, while in fact it only breeds hypocrisy and miscommunication. This is also an example of misunderstandings and conflicts between generations: some mundane members of older generations simply don't really understand the more modern ideals of young people, and from incomprehension stemmed suspicions and fear, which is unfortunate and laughable. Some of them are also realizing the issue for sure but the number is still small. The sooner it's gone in our culture the better. I guess it takes time though just as it probably did in other places in the world. Culture changes are always a kind of behind the socio-economic changes.
One problem is that you aren't allowed to make mistakes in social situations anymore without facing extreme consequences, and you're right that it isn't the sort of thing you can learn by reading about it. There's really no chance for young'uns to learn in this day and age.
It's tough, and the worst part is that there's no way out or hope for things to improve. And you can't complain or seek help, or you get treated like someone who must be broken to feel that way. It's an impersonal and judgemental world that we live in today, no matter who you are or what your views are like.
No wonder so many people seem to feel that our current culture and society are so vehemently toxic that they aren't worth even trying to participate in.
What's the use of just saying it's not a thing? Make a point.
I agree with OP. People around my generation (middle of the road millennial) and especially those younger have laughable basic social skills. The median 25-year-old can't talk on the phone, walk up to someone at a party and start a conversation, or act like a human being with a cashier or server. They also flake out on plans some huge percentage of the time. Drugs, porn, games, and social media are preferred to face-to-face interaction. Normal interactions, which are obviously often slightly awkward, are "cringe," and obsession with them produces a neurotic paranoia in daily interactions. And then we wonder why there's a mental health crisis, and why our communities are disintegrating, or why no one trusts society or one another.
We lose so much potential in these people to change social norm from conventions nobody else is willing to question. Especially when you drug them from a young age into a continuous waking stupor.
A lot of aged traditions that will not mesh with an instantaneously connected, constantly communicating and sharing global society will not work in the next several decades, and some of the textbook "unbalanced" will hopefully be the ones to push change to match changing realities.
It's reasonable to presume that a long-term implication of inculcating a "never talk to strangers" mentality into young children is the gradual decline of social trust, potentially leading to the collapse of civil society generally.
I think a t least some of the intense polarization, "culture war" acrimony, paranoia, and institutional dysfunction we're seeing today is attributable to the coming of age of people who were raised this way.
FWIW I think that the younger generation is realizing they shouldn't afraid to be genuine about their feelings and public statements, unlike Gen X and the older Millenials before them. The world is getting weirder and scarier and the information/entertainment overload is overwhelming and anxiety-inducing. A lot of people are seeking out a real warmth and an un-snarky, eyeroll-free reception to their words and art. Problem is that our culture now forgets nothing. Too much self-reflection, too much nostalgia.
> I don’t think young people appreciate how talking to strangers in public went from common and acceptable to creepy and taboo in the last 15 years
... uh, what? I meet people (i.e., "talk to strangers") all the time in public, it hasn't changed at all (and I've been doing it for far longer than 15 years). OK, work's a little different (but that was never particularly a place (for me, anyway) to meet people), but the rest? Don't see the "creepy and taboo" at all.
No, I am saying it seems like some millenials seem unaware of the possible consequences of their behaviour to others and to themselves.
And if there is a confrontation, they'll report you to their teacher ( police ).
While when I grew up, when I misbehaved in traffic, say concerning a taxi(cab), the driver would stop, make his opinion loudly heard, perhaps accompanied by a threat of violence ( this actually happened ).
But now we are in a situation where neighbours can not confront each other anymore, and the preferred course of action is a mediator ( teacher / police ).
That's a shame. I hope they get better at empathy and engaging with alternative points of view.
I wonder if part of it is youth. I am now 35 and have a more nuanced point of view on things (at least I try). When I was 25, I wasn't as good at it, and I was especially less experienced at communicating about it.
It's terrifying to me that selfishness and self-centeredness has apparently taken over that generation of young people. Our society and culture are doomed if this doesn't change.
It seems to me that they're only "hard to persuade" because they are constantly bombarded with these mental viruses. There was (books/telegraph then?) radio, then TV, then internet, social media, scrolling social video... While it's true that each generation eventually develops some immunity to their entertainment afflictions, it does seem to be accelerating, and those not exposed as youth have less immunity (grandpa on facebook). It also seems to have continuing impact even if most become functioning members of society.
Your anecdote about your son's behavior is the kind of insight that convinces me that parents have a window into the future the rest of us don't. I'm relatively young (mid 20's), but even still it's clear to me the even younger generations are developing fundamentally different ways of operating in the world than I did.
I think phenomena like the reverse network effect resulting in isolating young people are terrifying. I don't know what will be the ripple effects, but I'm inclined to think they won't be good. I also don't know what to do about it, but I get the feeling this is going to become a huge problem modern society hasn't paid enough mind.
I think it's just the opposite. Kids who've grown up with this crap will be wise to the tricks. Those who don't get exposed until adulthood have no resistance. Just like how the younger generation is pretty good at using social media responsibly and prioritizing stronger relationships, whereas the older generation get hooked and spend their whole lives yelling in newspaper comment sections.
This will only be a temporary issue which will disappear with the generation which will resist the most. Most behavioural changes and changes to the norm just need to wait until the first generation dies out and to all subsequent generations this will be the only norm they ever knew. A great example is smoking in public places in Europe. The people who think this restricts their freedom is slowly disappearing. Most young people and new generations find it normal that smoking in public places is prohibited and they would resist if someone was to try to change that now.
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