Managers need people that can tell them the truth no matter how upsetting the truth is. Companies fail when bad managers expect their employees to just smile and say yes sir while the ship is sinking. It's not until their ankles start to get wet they wonder why no one told them about all the holes in the ship.
Almost always, when I tell a manager the truth about what I see, he also answers me with some part of the truth about the company. But you have to be careful with this method, almost any manager is afraid that after realizing the truth, you still have to reconfigure yourself or do something about the unwitting witness.
As a person who was a manager in the situation you describe, I disagree. My obligations are as follows: (1) to my co-workers/reports as fellow human beings; (2) to my work as a professional; (3) to the company that pays me for my professional services.
When a company has bad leadership, it makes everybody miserable and often ends in failure—you are screwed twice, first by being exploited/overworked and second by it all being for naught. I will tell my reports when upper management is garbage. I will even encourage them to consider their options. Why? Because they aren’t children. They are adults with lives and families. And I’d be a hypocrite otherwise, because I’d also be considering my options.
Edit: I actually now feel pretty strongly that “I have to hide the truth about the company from my reports” is unjustifiable, self-serving nonsense bordering on the unethical.
Managers can make their subordinates life difficult with basically no recourse except quitting or maybe changing teams. Speaking up is not a good strategy.
Because of this tenuous relationship managers may have no idea they are stepping on the toes of their subordinates. They can break trust without any feedback.
Being encouraging really costs nothing and assures people that their contributions are valued.
Do your employees understand the status quo clearly, or are there things that are hidden from them? The last thing in the world you want to do is avoid giving them bad news because you hope you can right the ship. You owe it to them to be honest and forthright.
While I whole heartedly agree with that you should tell people how to get better, I think if there is one skill a manager should have it is to emphatically communicate.
If a manager doesn't understand the communicative basic that there is always multiple messages:
- the message they intended to send
- the message they actually sent
- the message as it was read by the receiving person
Any decent communicator will always think about how the message/language will be read by the receiver(s). That means if they are a decent communicator this should not happen unless they have a very bad day or something.
I disagree. Rather strongly actually. I’ve had bad managers that couldn’t communicate. I’ve been that manager. I’ve learned how to communicate to be more effective with others. Everyone has blockages and traumas (especially now). It’s important to use those in context and draw from that experience. It’s not HR motivated, it’s a style of empathetic communication.
If there was bad news to be given, he'd just melt into the background and let someone else do it, even though he'd hired me. (It was a rather dysfunctional company in general).
At the level I’m at now, I always ask the hiring manager how do they deliver bad news and what is their theory on feedback. I’m usually responsible for major initiatives even if I am 70% a heads down coder. I actually found it refreshing when a senior manager told me straight up that I missed a requirement and that it was a “big f-up”, after dealing with managers that beat around the bush.
I’ve got work to do, initiatives to lead, etc. I don’t have time to be reading between the lines. I want a manager who lays it on the line so I can course correct. Working at a small company, major mistakes mean a lot.
It's incredibly hard to deliver bad news with the right tone. The objective is to deliver precise, true information, and have people go and think (not guess) what's the impact on them.
Conversly, it's really easy to sound as if you don't care enough, or be openly frustrated and deflecting responsibility to someone else (especially if that's justified). This way you end up with people angry at individuals, and not thinking about the next steps (whether getting their own career in order, or continuing the project in a different setup).
Lying, or being wishy-washy is the path of least resistance. I think managers are getting paid to do uncomfortable things and with time might become awesome even in these hard situations, but YRMV.
I had the same experience. My manager refused to see what was in front of him. After I left that jobs, my mental health greatly improved because I no longer had to deal with unrealistic deadlines from my incompetent manager. The next time I run into this situation again, I know not to voice my concerns and just start looking for a new job. There is no point disagreeing because it is alway you that will lose no matter the outcome. People like sweet talkers, not naysayers. Let them find out themselves when the hard way.
P.s. after I left, my manager couldn’t ship anything for 1 full year. It turns out, I was the only one keeping the boat afloat.
I've been lucky to work for a manager who acted this way. He never articulated it because it was clear from day one that he was going to bat for me and everyone on his team. The results spoke for themselves.
I had a manager recently who did actually express a similar sentiment despite acting to the contrary. It made for a toxic environment. I would rather he spoke the truth that was in his heart than try to build trust on empty words.
Even "great" managers don't know what's going on in your personal or internal life unless you tell them.
And most managers are, statistically, going to fall into good/mediocre/poor categories, all of whom will doubly need you to tell them when something's up.
> The truth is the final and most endemic problem. Employees incorrectly (in many cases) believe that the boss doesn't want to hear from them, doesn't want constructive feedback.
This needs to be thought through a bit more.
A blunt, honest comment to ones boss is often the kind of thing that has a small upside in the best case, and a large downside in the worst case. Why take a nearly pointless risk? What the boss thinks he "wants" is hardly relevant.
It's also very important to let the message go through the right/intended channel. That in my experience happens more often.
Decision making and communication is often slow, and less experienced leads and managers start proactively to leak and share some part of the story, or even wrong information, without passing enough context or using the right language. And they just don't understand the consequences.
The fact that you implicitly assume that sharing information with your manager means they are failing to do their job is probably indicative if a bit of an adversarial attitude. At least it also came across like that to me. The way I see it, most managers I've worked with have been stretched for time and me giving information will only make things better for me and my team because the quality of their help will be better, regardless of how good they are at their job.
I agree you should not try to push through a bad situation, it really depends on the people involved and it's hard to give generic advice.
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