Thanks for the advise and you're right, but this isn't my usual nightly routine. I took her out this weekend, like I do most weekends and I'm taking her away to Germany this summer - she wanted to go ever since I've known her. I'm not the perfect boyfriend, but I really do love my girlfriend and I do everything I can for her. Mine and her happiness comes first, period. The only reason I'm up tonight is because I wish I could give her more.
Better idea. Give up on some fake dream, put in the hours now at your job. Give your girlfriend the attention she deserves or do her a favor and get away from her. Find your own mental stability, and go from there. You'll feel a hell of a lot better.
The girlfriend is actually far more motivated than me, she's just learned not to wake me and I've learned how to sleep through the smell of oatmeal coming from the kitchen.
The harsh truth is this girl probably won't be around forever. She probably has a legitimate complaint, but it also sounds like you're doing what's most important to you right now. When you're in the right relationship you should feel like your partner is supportive and feel like you can be a better person than you can be alone. Relationship maintenance should come naturally. It may not always be easy, but it should feel at least as important as the other things you do instead of like a chore. That's not the vibe I'm getting from what you wrote. It sounds like work is what you love and your girlfriend is the job.
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Maybe my take on this is a little tainted. I was in a similar situation many years ago. I chose the girl and I'll probably continue to kick myself for it a while longer. In my case, the fact that we even had this issue was probably indicative of the relationship not being the right fit for either of us. There are a lot of things that I wish I'd been able to do back then.
For those taking notes, your girlfriend may respond negatively to going to bed alone while you have one-on-one time with her friend or roommate (or any other woman) late at night, especially if the other is being "nice."
Your girlfriend is correct, obviously, they always are, even when they aren't. Especially if you're planning on getting anything other than sleep in that next "full 24 hours"
your chatbot is subpar. i suggest you get a better chatbot.
mine:
To make your girlfriend happy, you could try the following:
Listen to her and understand her perspective
Show appreciation and affection regularly
Be supportive and considerate in your actions and words
Be open to compromise and finding a solution together
Make time for shared activities and experiences that bring you both joy
Take responsibility for your actions and apologize when necessary
Communicate openly and honestly with each other to maintain trust and intimacy.
Remember, every relationship is unique and what works for one couple may not work for another. The key is to have open and ongoing communication to understand each other's needs and work together to find what works for your relationship.
The first thing you should do is essentially read her what you've typed here. It sounds like your relationship would benefit a great deal from some openness. She isn't going to react to this badly.
And in my experience with women, a little bit of time goes a long way if you do it right. Surprise her with flowers. Take her on a picnic. These things don't take much time but give her something to brag about to her lady friends.
You'd be surprised how just a few hours a week can convert a downward spiral relationship into a flourishing one.
I posted before but I wasn't happy with it; you've about summed up what I had to say. I don't know OP or his girlfriend, but I was with someone with depression for over 2 years. Frankly, my need to help her made things worse; instead of getting out of bed and forced into the cold light of day, she could stay in and I would console her. We both missed class, and work, and there were whole days when I couldn't focus because she had an episode before I left, and I eas afraid she would harm herself.
Ultimately, I do think I love her deeply, but since we've parted we've both done much better socially, and she seems more motivated and focused on her treatment. Obviously schizophrenia is a very different situation, and I hope OPs story doesn't go that way, but there are definitely some of the same things I recognized in myself in the first year of our relationship in this post. Hopefully OP can maintain the balance between support and life-long self-sacrifice.
Try to be a great partner to your girlfriend! It will be a challenging and demanding time for her, so any help you can give her will be greatly appreciated.
Thanks for the advise and you're right, but this isn't my usual nightly routine. I took her out this weekend, like I do most weekends and I'm taking her away to Germany this summer - she wanted to go ever since I've known her. I'm not the perfect boyfriend, but I really do love my girlfriend and I do everything I can for her. Mine and her happiness comes first, period. The only reason I'm up tonight is because I wish I could give her more.
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