AFAIK it might be more common than you think. I have a female friend who's firstname is Fanny and another one who's lastname is Cocq. They both expect a few laugh when they introduce themselves in english speaking countries.
I know the feeling. My name is Simone and I am from Italy. In most of the world, they think it's a female name (usual guess: French lady) until they see me :)
One thing I've always wondered is how much if any awareness expats have of western last names. For instance, not to imply names matter, but the most famous person who shares my last name was a boxer. Great man, but he wasn't famous for being an Isaac Newton. So I'd hope no one would look at my name and think, oh she must be the kind of person who's really good at using her body rather than her brain. My experience with American culture is we only really focus on the positive aspects of names. Like if you're having a conversation with a Vanderbilt or a Rothschild it's hard to not notice that, but there's really not much awareness in terms of negative associations with names, since everyone deserves a shot, and since everyone's looking for their shot, it's the folks with prolific names who'd be more likely to conceal them.
I experience the opposite. I have the Irish name 'Cathal' which isn't very well known outside of Ireland. I've spent the past year in the US and every time I'm introducing myself to someone I hesitate and mentally prepare for the 'wait what?' after I tell them my name.
It's common here for restaurants and cafes to ask for your name when ordering, and often I'll make up a more common name for myself to avoid the hassle spelling out and explaining 'Cathal' to the cashier.
Having a unique name does however create an interesting talking point when talking to a new person, and it seamlessly opens up a discussion about my background and origins after introducing myself.
The "opposite" side of this issue is people who intentionally adopt a pronounceable name of their destination country. I may have observed that, but I'm not really sure. Some of my Chinese students, who could barely speak French, were called totally french-sounding names like "Cédric" or "Pauline". I guess they invented them on the spot, to avoid people butchering their real names. But I never thought of a non-awkward way to ask them about that.
There is a cultural aspect to it as well: when I lived in Switzerland, I noticed, it is very common to use the name of the person in almost every sentence when referring to another person. Be it greeting, asking something or leaving the place. I would often times try to mimic it, yet would not be able to come up with the name of the person fast enough, even though I knew the name. I guess it's a matter of practice.
Anecdotal evidence to the contrary: I'm in the UK and have known a few people from parts of Africa over the years, they've all had made up simple short names because they tired of people but being able to deal with their real names (either not being able to pronounce it, or making a big thing if it sounding strange). And it wasn't just a short nick-name based on their name that they use generally: their friends from the region would call them something different. Likewise a polish fellow in one of my current circles does the same (though I don't know any of his wider social network so don't know if this simpler name is used more generally).
It may be a regional thing (partly because some languages use sounds like "clicks" that we don't, so have difficulty replicating): I've encountered numerous people from the middle & far East and they haven't done this.
It's not for no reason -- lots of people who go other places than America / English speaking countries adopt names in the local language as well, for convenience and ease of movement in the local culture.
Explaining how to pronounce a name with multiple vowels in a row is goddamn hard in a lot of places.
Extending this to regions seems like it could be a useful next step here.
I’m from the U.K. and my partner is Australian. While almost all names I’ve encountered in Australia are known names in the U.K., some would be very out-there for a U.K. name. I’m sure the same is true the other way around.
Not to mention the fact that this seems to be using an American English set of names and there are some very different naming conventions in the U.S. My last name is a first name in the U.S., and popular first names there are again very out-there for the U.K. or Australia.
I’m sure the same must be true for Spanish or French speaking countries.
Actual scenario that happened to me: had an asian-american colleague whose first name was a generic western name, while his last name was german (due to someone on his dad's side of the family being german).
It's not unusual for this to occasionally happen in English-speaking countries, though it is not ubiquitous in the way it is in Spain. Also note that the two names don't necessarily come from her 2 parents; it's quite possible (indeed, likely) that she inherited that name through several generations.
My last name is Marié and I smile every time I see write MARIE without the accent, maybe one day it will be a thing of the past and people will stop thinking I'm a girl named Marie
This isn't a good signal imo. The world is undergoing a lot of cultural mixing at the moment so making the assumption that someones last name indicates their cultural participation is a dangerous one. For instance, I have a very French name but I also have near zero French cultural implications.
I don't think we are, since the region you claim the behavior generalizes too is the one I am also most familiar with. I think you are simply making the mistake of confusing "a person's preferred appellation, which is sometimes their legal first name but very often something either subtly [as in shortened form] or radically different from.the first name" with simply "first name".
As I mention above, I'm not so obtuse as to have a negative reaction to someone making an effort to say my name as I introduce myself, because of a non-native sound.
Different alphabets do introduce unique challenges, but across all languages using the same Roman alphabet, it's spelled D-A-V-E. (Or D-A-V-I-D if you insist.)
But then, I've never had anyone in any culture besides my high school language teacher tell me my name was something different.
I'm not sure what it says about the English language that common given names also refer to genitalia, money, prostitutes' clients and toilets (e.g. dick, willy, john and so on).
Probably nothing, but still pretty awkward as a foreigner. You'd think these names would fall out of style but apparently everybody tries their best to be mature about it.
Americans usually can't pronounce my name when they read it, they can't spell my name when they hear it, and they predict the opposite gender. Interestingly, Brits, even though they speak the same language, usually get everything right.
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