Isn't this passive aggresive? Would you do this in real life? I feel like this thinking would breed bad culture and is a short-term win at the expense of a long-term relationship.
Perhaps being passive aggressive is a choice, not just something people need to do. I could use the latent, or manifest, threat of violence to get my way in relationships. I choose not to, because I like those relationships and want them to continue. Is that passive aggressive?
While interesting, I think the essay vastly oversimplifies in its effort to make a point.
um, I don't find it passive at all. I don't do this, nor have I saw this, but if someone really has negative experiences with others and decides to put this into their status, that is pretty much the opposite of passive aggressive behavior, it seems to me like basic assertive communication (state your preference, talk about what you want/need)
Okay, if we worked with each other in real life, I would accept that and I guess never speak to you that way.
Since this is a discussion of communication theory, I have to say, it’s crazy to me that you read it as passive aggressive.
Like when I say bad things about you, you can just accept those things in a straightforward fashion. However when I say good things about you, that cannot be accept in just as straightforward a way, and instead it is viewed as passive aggressive.
No, people respond to displays of anger. And if the other person's convinced you were in the right, it might not even damage the relationship in the long run.
That will come across as passive aggressive or manipulative at best. You need considerable charisma to be able to pull something like that off. It is nice as vengeance dream, but in practice would turn against him. It is therefore bad advice.
Acting passive-aggressive is not something you do very consciously. I must admit I'm guilty of it and if it really comes from fear of embarrassment or making mistakes then that is a real problem.
But I think passive-aggresiveness can also be seen as the result of being unable to vent your anger/frustration. This inability may not always be your own fault. As with the original case of passive-aggressive soldiers, they had no available normal outlet.
If you are in a relationship which you feel you can not break, it is basically the same thing. When you're past the point that venting anger changed things, and now only harms things, passive-aggressiveness is the only road left.
reply